Cows give more milk in the Free Market

George Bush - Doodh ka Doodh paani ka paani
or I think this should be
Oil jaise Doodh ,Khoon jaise Paani

News Flash

The IMF has just confirmed that cows give more milk
when they are milked in a country that have a free market and
freedom (George Bush alone knows what freedom means) .

In a detailed study that spanned 3 years and involved 16 countries
each of which had a different combination of economic and political systems.

Cows that lived in countries that had a free market plutocracy(like the US )
produced on an average 43 % more milk than cows that
lived in socialist/communist countries.

Scientists have discovered that cows that lived in
socialist/communist countries had greater tension in the muscles of
their mammary glands which in turn contracted the
passage ways through which milk had to pass .
This was the main cause for low output.

The main reasons for tension among socialist/communist cows was that
they were concerned with
imperialism, mad cow disease, the welfare and liberation of
oppressed cows in other parts of the world ,the rape of planet earth
and fear that McDonald was coming to a town near them.

In countries that had freedom and free markets
the cows were relaxed ,they had no
tensions (the government was in their pocket
giving them billion $ tax cuts)
and they did not worry about different breeds of cows.

Their life was one long orgy of consumption
They lived like they will never die and when it was time to die
they mooed that they had never lived.

The IMF has also stated that
Milking cows after placing them directly in front of pictures of
different personalities produced different quantity and quality of milk

Here are some findings

Cows that were milked under a potrait of Stalin gave on a average 79 % lesser milk than normal

Cows that were milked under a potrait of Pol Pot died soon after the milking process

Cows that were milked under a potrait of Bush did not give any milk
but had sudden bouts of loose motions

Cows that were milked under a potrait of Deve Gowda went to sleep

Cows that were milked under a potrait of Arindam Chaudhary(IIPM)
dared to dream beyond the cowshed and ended up in slaughterhouses.

Citing this report IMF has called upon India to effect wide scale privatization and
hand over its markets,economy and sovereignty to global capital and foreign corporations.
Manmohan Singh has promised to look into this and is expected to speak to the commies
on this issue soon....

End of Report

This link is hilarious the first time I saw it I watched it again and again for I don't know how many times .The song is catchy too

If you have read this far in my post then there is no point in not
watching the best part
Watch this flash animation now !

Cows with Guns !(What Commie/Socialist Cows do ... )

Cow-se-tung I think you of all people will love this but I think you might
have already watched this..

If you enjoyed Cows with Guns
you will definately enjoy


Renegade Eye said…
Thank you for visiting my blog. I'm adding a link to this cool blog.

I'm from Minneapolis actually.

Cows seem to thrive under capitalism. That proves Marx wrong. All left groups will disband now.

Very good report Comrade... I alway sensed something fishy fishy in communism, but know I have the "scientific" analysis to back my assertion ;)

Anyways, where did you get this report from? Can you please send this to the CMKP email list- I hope you have joined it. Comrades, need some time off from serious political discussion and laugh at anti-communist propoganda.

In Solidarity!
greensatya said…
Haha, quite funny.

You do lot of digging on internet it seems.
Lol,Cows and IIPM , he he

Hillarious, you rock !!

what about Cows of EU, where they on average get 2 dollars per day as subsidy ?

do they directly pass out cheese ?
Anonymous said…
haha! Gaurav is in poor form. He also did not link to your website, lest you get publicity ;)

Apparently the decision to privatise emergency management was taken at the local level and a lot of people now agree that the Mayor was not such a hero after all.

In such emergency circumstances as happened in New Orleans, only massive state level operations have worked in the past. I go by past successes and privatisation just doesn't work in this instance.
Cow Tse Tung said…
Crazyass article. Have you been over to Pradhan Mantri's blog - another good satirical weblog.

Man, I found that Dana Lyons song/animation inspiring enough to drop whatever corny nom de plume I was using before. Its the most amazing Flash toon ever.
Here's more Peta fun for you guys :
Renegade Eye said…
I added a link to your blog at mine, so I'll visit more often.
ambarwarrior said…
Hey that is so funny! Did you read the "cow" joke I have on my blog? We both have "cows" on the brain I guess. Thank you for leaving a comment on my blog!! From, your capitalist comrade!
@Renegade eye - Thanks for linking me up

@Vidrohi - I haven't yet joined the group I will join it soon and I made this stuff up

@ Green satya , Diminutive Indian -Thanks

@Anonymous - I would really appreciate it if you could rebuttle gaurav's post I am unable to do so because of lack of time

@Cow se tung -Thanks for links

@New Metro woman - Yeah I read it I think I am gonna post it on my blog
Anonymous said…
Hey, I don't think Gaurav deserves a reply. He didn't have the decency to post a link to you while criticising you.

Anyway he is wrong on many fronts. Even a libertarian found him dead wrong.

Wish you a very nice trip.

yum yum